What My Cover Letter & Resume Should Say

The resume is too long. Yes the resume is long because I have worked for decades and all of it is relevant.

When using the Internet for collecting job offers one places resumes and cover letters on myriad sites. The fond hope is that carefully crafted work fits the requirements of the individual looking for talented people.
Unfortunately in this day and age the process is layered with several people or web forms prior to getting to the actual individuals that can judge one’s abilities.
This brings to mind thoughts of what I would rather have said when wordsmithing the erudite cover letter and resume.
What follows is a mixture of venting and fun at the expense of the reviewer of my submitted products. It is in the form of their response followed by my response.

1.  The resume is too long. Yes the resume is long because I have worked for decades and all of it is relevant.

2.  An inventory of skills is just a list of “buzzwords”? No you idiot they are the actual hands-on devices, applications, and systems used in my experience.

3.  The form of the resume is not in the correct “person”.  May I point out that the form is not in the correct person’s hand?

4.  There are too many jobs in a short time frame.  Yes consulting work runs a few months to a year or so; seldom longer unless hired into the organization.

5.  There needs to be more narrative.  Wait a minute. You just complained it was too long.

6.  The content is too technical.  Duh! Who is reading this?

7.  I do not see any relevant experience.  Could you if I gave it to you in any other form? A documentary maybe?

8.  There are only successes shown in the resume.  What?

9.  You should have a professional write you a resume.  Would you recommend your secretary?

10.  You should have a professional write you a resume.  You were right…….and the massage was fantastic!

Latest Twist In Recruiting Practices

Lately, since I refreshed my resume on the job boards, I have been receiving duplicate calls from recruiters who are outside of US borders and obviously are not speaking English as their first language.

I do not harbor any ill toward those hard working individuals, but I cannot understand them given my impaired hearing.  They are given the task of doing all the cold calling to potential recruits based upon scans of the job boards and matches of keywords.

It seems that many big name agencies in the US have now resorted to doing this in order to compete in the recruiting business.  It is drudgery and very unpopular among young recruiters.

The problem is a “Freakonomics” problem where the analysis of the money stream finds conflict with the purposes of recruitment.  The callers are paid by contacting the potential recruit, confirming answers to basic questions on a script, and getting the recruit to send a confirming email with the latest resume attached.

This would be innocuous if it were not for the redundant calls made to the potential recruit and if it was communicated for what client or customer.  The clients or customers want to be withheld until the cold caller secures the confirming email and resume.  That is their guarantee of payment for the work.  The problem is the candidate has no idea if they are being resubmitted many times to the same job; which eliminates them from consideration.

If that hurdle is cleared by the candidate, the recruiting agency that hired the cold caller then calls and wants to discuss the job when the candidate has not been told that someone else might call.  This is often made worse by having the cold caller’s “manager” call to verify the contact or to ask even more scripted questions.  At this point you may have had three to five phone calls and spoken to total strangers that have no idea about your true capability or experience.

Once these challenges are met the recruiter then wants a couple of things to make their job easier.  First they want the recruit to talk to the account executive that has the requisition from the client.  Again a nontechnical stranger does a filtering of your resume details and experience.  Second they ask to have your resume modified to a shorter length and to only discuss details pertinent to the job offering.  The reasoning is that the “hiring manager” doesn’t read long resumes.

At this point I often look at this circumstance as impossible as I may never get to talk to an individual who has the technical moxie to see I have more than enough capability to perform the job requirement.  To make maters worse they then often want two or three references from supervisors from previous, read most recent, jobs.

What they may fail to realize is that when one signs on to a contract there is specific language that precludes discussing any details of the contract with anyone outside of the contracting organization and the customer.

They’ll do dumb things like ask “why did you leave the last job after eighteen months?” when it is obvious that contracting jobs last short periods and complete so that you leave and go looking for more contracts.

They’ll ask what you want to do.  The employment desired section of your resume is never read.

They will always ask for you to lower your hourly rate.  They must not realize that one looks for another job or contract expecting to receive the same or greater compensation than what has gone before.  They also could just be chiselers.

Alas I have amassed a long list of blocked phone numbers, do not answer phone numbers, PITA phone numbers, spam email sources, and trash email lists in an effort to not waste too much time on these characters.

Tell me about your experiences please.  -BL

Bad Men with Personal Agendas

I recently finished a permanent position after taking too much abuse. It was a toxic environment where my team was constantly overburdened without regard for anything but covering the boss’s incompetence, lack of honesty, rudeness, egocentric behavior, over commitment of our time, technological incompetence, and misuse of the corporate human resource process.

I cussed the man vigorously to his face. He was a liar and he only sought to eliminate my efforts to repair long standing technological missteps. In the guise of the pursuit of perfection, all team and individual efforts were regarded as insufficient or incompetent. I have lived too long and done too much to accept that assessment.

The really bad news is that this boss rides herd on the systems that take care of the collection and distribution of the blood supply. He is uneducated and only has the experience of that business and a limited previous work life.
The idea of work life balance is lost on that individual as they have no family, spouse, children, or significant other to care for in this life.
The same individual appears to not have any social skills related to mixing with people and having sensitivity or compassion for others.
A nerd run amok.

How Can I Help?

This evening an acquaintance ask me to come over and help with the installation of some artificial grass. I had on many occasions provided a fix for some predicament they got into.

It did not go well.

I arrived late after working late and spending a brief time at home getting a meal. I was confronted with a demand to lay the artificial material on the dirt after leveling everything using some sand piled in bags in the corner of the area.

The area had been worked by someone to level the hard ground. It was, for the most part, very smooth and level. I explained that putting sand down would not provide a stable underlayment.

The demand was for more flatness and no holes. That had been already realized by the previous work. I began to take the material out to size up the issues with how the seams would line up and what would be needed to join the sections to make a one-piece artificial grass area.

At that point criticism was made that they could have done that already and why had I not put any sand down. The rant went on for some time. I sat down on a chair and thought of what I would have to do.

There was not lighting in this area so I was working in the dark. I was pondering what I would have to do to further level the span and how would I firm up the ground with loose sand; and not nearly enough of it.

To help, the acquaintance turned on the cell phone flashlight to attempt to illuminate the area. It was shined directly into my face as a litany of the shortcomings about my efforts spewed forth. I had enough!

At that point I yelled to turn the F%$#)!* light off. I yelled at them about how I cannot understand what is being said without seeing their face and watching them speak; my hearing is damaged and that had been explained many times.

At this point I was told I needed to take a rest….I must be tired. They were right. I was tired of trying to explain the correct way to do this and that being ignored. I was tired of being called at the last minute because others had been run off of the project by the same condescension and abuse.

I could not see a quick fix for this. The suggestions as to how much and how long it would take were being dismissed.

The hot seaming required of the segments was unknown and the raising of the issue generated even more abuse.

I picked up my tools and announced that I was done. I came home angry. I had been called at the last minute. My understanding of what needed to be done was disregarded. My respect for the individual has ebbed.

How can I help such an individual?

Undefined Expectations

The process of building IT infrastructure is particularly difficult when the managers you’re working for do not express specifications or expectations. To exacerbate this the method of tasking one to perform work and then roundly chastising them for not fulfilling the manager’s every expectation is somewhat of a manic behavior.

This behavior is common in the middle management of organizations today.The managers are ill-trained and ill-prepared to deliver the demands of their superiors. The demands or expectations exceed reason in that they do not have adequate specification nor do they contain the fundamental information necessary to produce the outcomes desired and expected by those managers and their superiors. This is largely caused by their ignorance of the technology.

The worst offenders in this case are those that once had their hands and minds in the work but now, in order to make the better paycheck, have been promoted to oversight and do not maintain a daily “hands-on” knowledge. They will spew things like “it must be perfect” without expressing any specifications whatsoever.

This all begs the question of how does one work in an environment like that? You would have to be able to take a beating on a regular basis without complaining nor being bothered by the fact that you are not appreciated. You would have to accept the fact that your skills would be deemed inadequate in the eyes of those managers. Lastly, your future paycheck is at risk.

Does this seem to be a reasonable observation?

Testing Without Touching

PSYCHIC SHOE REPAIR

That is a real sign on Thomas Road in Phoenix Arizona.  It is also the summary of what some enterprise managers want in terms of obtaining telemetry for performance measurement in data networks.

One cannot use the network to measure the network.  One cannot have access to capture data packets.  Existing enterprise tools, that they provide, do not have any capacity to give one critical performance data.  How then is one to do performance engineering?

The answer was there on the sign all the time!

Core Competency?

I was engaged recently in a project to identify the traffic on a global network to solve slowdowns in the work being performed by engineers on high performance workstations.

The most difficult part of the work was the total lack of tools.  The second most difficult thing was the failure of the management to be concerned about that.

The mission was to gather requirements to be submitted to enterprise network plan, build, and run teams so that the slowdown problems could be remediated.

As I began, the requests went in for basic information like a global network map, monitoring tools, and access to machines in order to place probes.

Network maps, either physical or logical, were non- existent or badly outdated.

The monitoring tool was a well known more than adequate management and performance monitoring system that I had used for many years.  It was not set up properly, it could not retain much information for analysis, and custom reporting access was refused.  It was installed in three regions without any joining together of the database backends.

Requests to get access to the machines to place probes was refused.

While this is going on I learn that the purchase of undersized, out of specification, equipment for a remediation of a site that was a decade overdue was being done so that a schedule was met and the money spent before the end of a fiscal cycle. The kind of work to be done on the site had no bearing on the decision.

One other interesting thing was that all datacenters were to be consolidated by collapsing them into fewer and fewer sites all colocated off-site from existing corporate sites.

Everyone in every technical discipline was concerned that the plan was inadequate and that given past practices the future was not going to be good.

The corporation was grown by acquisition.  It was not grown by innovation.  Decades old talent that had worked at the acquired organizations left in droves.  Those that remained were waiting for their retirement.

When asked about why the organization would place their data centers into another organization’s hands the reply was “It is not our core competency”.

Given the experience one wonders what is their core competency?  I know! Pass the buck.

 

 

Education in Arizona: Republican or TEA Party Punishment

It seems that Diane Douglas, a TEA partyer, and her entourage, have decided to finally disclose the travesty of their chief financial controller’s misspending of Title 1 federal dollars.  The blame is being cast upon staff that is gone from the agency.  It is also being blamed on previous administrations.  This is all transference or simplly put; buck passing!

The tab is 62 million dollars.  The Fed wants it back.  The incompetents at the Department of Education have decided to punish the schools for the agency’s transgressions.  They handed it out wrongly and want to take it back by reducing what gets paid to the schools.  The idea of the State paying the bill and not the schools has completely escaped their thinking.

How this all came about is the result of the federal governments Title One monies being dispersed incorrectly and allowably by the main money man at the agency all during the administrative changes resulting from elections.  Yes the same guy with different bosses did this.  Now his missteps, or outright illegal activity, are going to cost the children of Arizona 62 million dollars before they every get a high school diploma.

In an effort to cover up the malpractices the head of the agency’s Title One was dismissed after 28 years.  All during that time she was against the funding practices of the agency, but powerless to control it.  Title One was the “slush fund” for the agency’s pet projects or a backstop for overspending in other areas of the administration.  Regardless of the elected bosses who came to the forth floor of the Department of Education, basic fund accounting was not being done correctly and the federal governments auditors caught them.

Now what is common in Arizona politics is to transfer the responsibility to someone down the chain of command or organizational hierarchy.  Yeah…buck passing!  Somewhere in the convoluted thinking of the leadership of these state agencies the idea that passing blame is sufficient to exhonerate the bossman or bosswoman.  Yes modern ethics do not require the simplest test of responsibility nor even a hint of cupability.  I think even the humblest of us looks at that as dishonest, deceitful, disengenuine, and an action with premeditated distain for the public expectation of “honesty in public service”.

So who is hurt and what are the consequences?  It seems no one can know what the state agencies will give for funding in education until the money arrives and some clear explanation is made for how the money is to be spent.  They may return long after dispensing the Fed’s money and take it back and hand you a bill for what they come up needing.  Yes they give money to the schools and take it back….often!  Our children are beaten repeatedly without explanation or reason.

The lastest scheme the Department of Education has cooked up involves taking dollars from other Federal program sources, let’s say Title Two, and consuming them in the secretive processes in the agency so that the shortages caused by the governor’s corporation favoring tax policies and the Arizona State educational revenue shortfall can appear to be working to further educations interests; ostensibly the children.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  The children are still being punished and now even more severely.

It is time for the public to take note of this and begin to push for a cleanup of the Arizona legislatures arrogant abuse of the taxpayers and their children.  Voting will not be enough.  Money will have to be formed in PACs and the funding of foundations like the Arizona Center for Law in the Public Interest should flourish.  It will take years and generations of activism to dismantle the disfunctional legislative and executive branches of the State of Arizona.  Teach your children well.  The governor, the legislature, and the Department of Education have not and will not.